Five Bizarre Secrets About Karl Marx

24 03 2012

Karl - The Most Famous Marx Brother

Capitalism for Dummies

Bizarre Marx secret No’1 Karl Marx was the president of the Beatles fan-club and YET he died in 1883. There is only one explanation for this: Time travel. Marx reckoned capitalism was fatally flawed. He predicted that due to the exploitation of the workers by the Capitalist class – i.e.those who own all the factories and machines – A.K.A. the means of production . . .that the workers would rise up and have a revolution, AKA the Revolution of The Proletariat. Guy was waaaay ahead of his time. It would be like standing up today and claiming there is a FREE energy device that you could practically make in your back yard or basement, that would by-pass the need for burning fossil fuels etc. Most people wouldn’t believe you. And then if you confidently predicted that people and companies who had bought up the patents and suppressed the technology for such free energy devices would be tried and found guilty of crimes against humanity . . .in the not too distant future . . .that would be time travel. So hey?! . . .trust the Quantum Flux Marx was a big Beatles fan. It was Capitalism for Dummies

Bizarre Marx secret No’2: Marx liked dressing up in Women’s clothing. He would play dress-ups and had a hit drag act in Paris in 1842. But what he was REALLY doing was promoting a Revolution of The Proletariat.  According to the Marxist theory such a revolution would take back the capital used to make stuff and put it in the hands the workers. This Marx said would be a Socialist Society. Marx said the eternal social conflict is a class war. This was on the evolutionary road to a classless society of peace love and mung beans which Marx described as Communism. What he didn’t realize was that the real class war would be between young working class boys & girls queueing up outside clubs and door bouncers from the Pacific Islands whose homes were about to be flooded by global warming due to the burning of fossil fuels. This highlighted the need for a science of complexity. In the future it would all be so clear. it’s Capitalism for Dummies

Bizarre Marx secret No’3: Marx was a deeply spiritual man.  But he pretended to be an Athiest. While promoting free love, free muesli and free money Marx had secretly founded the Pyramid Church for Rock & Roll and Jimi Hendrix incorporating video games the alphabet and whales. But what he said was Religion is poison. This is because he could see that as a socially constructed project religion was working hand in glove with the capitalists to keep the worker bees in a straight line. That worked well. Actually he used to have secret drinks with Jesus and the Buddha every Friday night. He would attend these drinks nights in full drag. Apart from being a pointy hatted wizard he was as gay as a maypole. Clearly it is Capitalism for Dummies

Bizarre Marx secret No’4: Marx was actually a visitor from another galaxy. He was a spaceman. He was also Jewish. Does this mean there are Jewish people on other planets? We’re not getting into the whole Zionist thing here. People get very offended about all this stuff. No one is quite sure how this works in fact. But . . .yep he was a little green man alright. Space people know all about Capitalism for Dummies

Bizarre Mark Secret No’5: Marx said that having ideas was useless and what mattered was action. This statement spurred on Lennin in Russia (October Revolution 1917) and Mao Tse Tung in China to form the pure classless Communist utopia by 1949. Interestingly. The only problem with this ideas are useless riff is that all he ever did was write books, articles and movie scripts for Hollywood. The actual truth is there is nothing as powerful as a Lime Flavoured Revolution whose time has come. The idea comes FIRST. Then people actually start doing stuff. Idea FIRST. Action SECOND. Idea FIRST. Action SECOND. Idea FIRST Action SECOND. Comprendez? Yes it’s Capitalism for Dummies

Comrade Lenin Licked a Lime Splice

22 03 2012

Lenin on his way to the shops for a Lime Splice

I Scream You Scream We Scream for Ice Cream

It is a well known fact among historians that Comrade Lenin liked to lick the Lime Splice. But they forgot to mention it. What historians always seem to carp on about were his political carryings on. Oh Hello! Just give us the facts. Here’s a guy who was a hard core ice cream eatin’ fool. And of course his absolute all time fave the Lime Splice. Let’s just say that Lenin was a big ice cream eater.

Full name: Vladimir Ilyich Lenin – spearheaded the October Revolution in Russia in 1917 as leader of the Bolsheviks. And it was all about ice cream for eveyone. Don’t ever let anyone tell you any different. Lenin was reputed to be a good talker when he wasn’t shovelling it down. You don’t see it in most pictures but he was quite rotund. Whilst not much of a head for politics, he was smart enough to bring in experts from the good old USA and Germany to do most of his thinking for him. A man’s gotta do what a man’s gotta do and in Lenin’s case it was to tongue tickle a tub. Caress the cool cream. Lick the last of the lime gelato and manhandle the mango passionfruit ripple.

He got the whole political thing from his childhood friend Karl Marx. They did a boyhood paper run in inner city London – working class Cockney Islington – and barracked for Arsenal football team.  Those were the days. Ar-Se-Naaal.

Abducted by a UFO at the age of 12 both boys returned with supernatural powers, glowing green eyes and love of ice-cream. Using the technique of time travel they also formed a hit ’80s pop band called Spandau Ballet – see video below. And so the future of the world was changed forever. It doesn’t take much to change the course of history. Apparently glowing green eyes will do it every time. I Scream You Scream We Scream for Ice Cream

I Want to go Back to the 60s When Things Were Simpler

13 03 2012

Popular 60s TV cooking show host . . . Chef Guevara

No I am not going to uninstall Firefox and install Google Chrome so myF%&#ing CRM will work!

That’s it! I’ve had it with all this complicated technology. Today was the last straw. I have suddenly become nostalgic for a time when things were simpler and less stressfull. Suddenly the ’60s seems like a place I want to go back to. And unlike the current bunch of teens and twenty somethings. . . dammit I was there! This is the proof. Here then is a groundbreaking historical perspective of the decade that brought you the Beatles, Jimi Hendrix, Woodstock, flower power and Banning the Bomb. Peace & Love.

Electronic Communication Device from the 60's - it's called a wireless . . .a radio!

Classic old Holden. The Family got around in one of these. Korean Cars, Chinese Cars . . .Japanese Cars!!! Not invented yet

There were no overweight people in the '60s. Everyone pretty much looked like this

The '60s was a Golden age of Peace Love and Happiness - even corrupt politicians were free-spirited and fun and would dance in the streets at the time of the full moon and put flowers in their hair - true!

Jimi Hendrix - Folk Guitar Legend

Every '60s Family had to have a GOAT

World's first confirmed contact with extra-terrestials made by John Lennon and his good friend President Richard M Nixon

John Lennon image above by Jeff Hopp – see more of his fabulous pshychedelic art at

We hope you enjoyed this brief tour of the 1960s double checked for accuracy by MediaMind Enterprises.  Section of The Beatles Yellow Submarine animated film with psychedelic art and music below

Transcendent Memes for Another Daily Planet

7 09 2011

The Hedgehog Shores of Princess Point

The wild sassafras orchids examine all the portals of eternity in the frog’s dark electronic pursuit. Palpable sneezing fireworks of the wand perplex somnambulistic beings dwarfed by the straggling undergrowth of parkland’s end. Lost upon wild shores of Princess Point they tangle in a blurred mass exhibiting mutant styrofoam money bags. Such are the Hedgehog Shores where a simple act of scratching an itch may be the purest pleasure known to the tanscendent human-like teddy bears of fairy floss GOD farm. Schnieble Syracuse implodes with packets of custard. Press Select to Continue

Lost upon wild shores of Princess Point they tangle in a blurred mass exhibiting mutant styrofoam money bags, yes such are the Hedgehog Shores – La de da de da – end message.

Wake Up and Smell the Fascism – Brady Bunch Style

16 07 2011

The Real Truth about the Brady Bunch

There is something that we who understand ourselves to be Citizens of The World – need to comprehend about the world today. It is a simple truth, and one that now carries with it the crystal clear ring of truth. We are living in a fascist society.

Now don’t get me wrong. Not all business people are crooked, and neither are all politicians. So how is it that our great industries and institutions are riddled with levels of corruption that make the Mafia look downright frumpy. I have a theory. My theory is that it has always been like this. More or less. And perhaps it IS as simple as this. Maybe since Moses played fullback for Jerusalem the world has just been ruled by feuding warlords and cartels of criminally insane barbarians. The successful ones called themselves the Royal Family and so things have gone since the beginning of time. These bastards are the crazies who will just do whatever it takes to make a buck, stay in power and get the kudos. Maybe.

But if we look closer there is something else going on as well. It seems things have actually been getting worse lately. How else can we explain Tony Abbott? A mad monk fighting with every breath in his budgie smugglers for the carpet bagging rights of the worst kind of excessive and insane brutalists. Abbott is an idealogue who sincerely believes in his own boring and boorish crusade. Will someone please sit the mad monk down and have a quiet and slow word . . .will someone please explain to this man that he is fighting on the side of the fascists.

The scariest thing about Abbott is that he appears to actually believe the utterly fantastic propaganda of the right. He is a sort of zealot boy scout who dropped out of seminary. He is the most dangerous of men – a true believer. The left is shamelessly close to his frightful political position with it’s own orgy of deregulation and mass privatisation. State labor governments have been fairly falling over themselves to sell off public utilities and place them in the hands of private enterprise. The mantra has been deregulate, privatise and outsource. And now look where we are. That’s another fine mess you’ve gotten us into.

And so now here we are . . . many decades on since we Australians began selling off the farm to the controlling overlords in the UK and the USA. It seems we are starting to get a little nervous when those getting in line to buy up what’s left of our national treasures – our food production, our ports and few remaining minerals – have yellow and brown skin. There’s no racial prejudice here surely! But it has suddenly come home to all but the most particularly dopey among us that selling off our assets – in this case to the Chinese and Indians  – might not be such a great idea. It didn’t seem so bad when we were giving it away for a song to the Poms and the Yanks though. Same difference folks. Maybe a slightly better brand of exploitation. Event that’s debatable.

The arguments that the Americans are strategic allies are really not so brilliant. We’ve been buying their crappy fast food and overpriced computer software to prove our loyalty. We’ve been marching off with them to fight dodgy wars. Why should they get our raw materials on the cheap as well? Doesn’t make sense. Oh yeah . . .we need foreign capital to invest in this country. What???!!!!!! We need foreign capital to invest in digging holes in the ground so they can cart off our priceless and irreplaceable mineral wealth? At least you can grow more food. Mate I’ll send a couple of blokes out into the bush with a four wheel drive and a pick and few shovels and tell them there’s beer buried deep in the ground. They’ll dig up whatever you like.

Mind you the Yanks definitely just take whatever they want from whomever they want – historically this is accurate. Why should Australia keep what is theirs? Perhaps it’s our Karma. We did after all steal the lot from the original Aboriginal inhabitants.
If this latest mob of crooks really were INVESTING and not just ripping us off then it might be different. So let’s get real. The USA has distinguished itself by becoming the greatest fascist nation on earth. A title now being hotly contended by China. Fascism is simply corporatism run amok. When corporations rule you and not governments elected of the people, for the people and by the people – what you get is what you’ve got now. This soulless corporatism has now wrapped its tentacles around every department of life spurred by a most peculiar belief that somehow it is free markets which can most capably direct the affairs of humanity. This has truly put Dracula in charge of the blood bank and it really is that frightening. If Dr Quantum is stretching the truth, how then my dear friends do you explain this? (And it is entirely symptomatic of the sick system known as the USofA) Watch video to check reality now. The facts.

Post-Modern Cosmic Bananas and What Happened to Feminism Anyway?

22 11 2009

Cassablanca Sideboard by Ettore Sottsass - a post modern icon

Dr Quantum was riffing on one of his favourite subjects recently – that would be Post-Modernism – when one of my good friends was indelicate enough to accuse me of engaging in, and i quote “mental masturbation”. Ouch!

It may well have been a case of “Charlie bit my finger and it really hurt”. Of course the thing is, don’t put your finger in Charlie’s mouth, silly. Nice theory. But if you can’t “sing” to your best friend what can you do? Save it for the shower perhaps? Hmmm.

Call me bananas if you like but there are few things i enjoy more than settling into a free ranging discussion liberally sprinkled with references to the P-Word. Post-Modernism. If there’s a chance to drop the F-Word; Feminism, even better.

One might suppose it’s like talking about God or Jesus or religion in general. Some people just don’t like it. Some people clearly feel threatened by it and most people simply don’t understand it at all. And this is where we will freeze frame for a moment.

Most people just don’t know what Post-Modernism IS. That’s the problem you see. One might as well be talking about the Twinkle-Bottomed Mind Bender Fish. The ignorance on this planet is apalling. Clearly Dr Quantum has work to do. We will leave an in-depth treatment of the Twinkle-Bottomed Mind-Bender Fish to another day. Suffice to say, if you should be so lucky that one of these lovely creatures wants to suck your toes – i say let them.

Yes most people don’t know what Post-Modernism is. To make matters worse the ones that do think they know are convinced that it’s about being confused or being confusing and often both. But do not be fooled, this is merely the subversive effect of Post-Modernism. Confusion is one of the outcomes albeit a temporary one.

Amid the bombed out rubble of the fallen towers of Balylon you can just see, emerging from the swirling dust and smoking ruins, a prophet of the New Age dressed in simple white flowing robes in the style of the Anceint Greeks. Yes it is i Dr Quantum come to talk simply, plainly yet effectively about Post-Modernism AND Feminism. Two dear reader for the price of one. It’s a BOGOFF sale. Buy One Get One Free. Gather round.

It is at this juncture that i would like to introduce you to one of this blog’s intimate little secrets. Come closer. I am whispering now . . . It’s right up there for everyone to not see. The sub-title of this blog, our slogan – Expressing a Fabulous Riot of Creativity is Post-Modernism explained in a sentence. May i be so bold as to suggest that if you were one of the people who wrote a book about Post-Modernism and still, no one understands what it means . . .it may be time to take note.

Post-Modernism is nothing if not a fabulous riot of creativity and Feminism its patron Goddess-Saint. But why is it so?


Okay a week is up. How is that? i hear you ask. The simple answer – time travel. A Fabulous Riot of creativity huh? Why?

Well the short answer – because it’s fun – is not nearly complicated enough is it? So let’s look @ the term Post-Modernism. Post meaning after; therfore literally – after Modernism. Well, what happened to Modernism? Who took it?

It could be said and rightly so, that Modernism disappeared up its own fundamental orifice. It was WHITE, it was RIGHT and it was way too UPTIGHT. It had to go. The only trouble was that Modernism had become a barnacle on the backside of the elephant of humanity. (The elephant’s name was Henry by the way) Oh, how did the barnacle get there you say? Don’t ask, it was there, allright. Barnacle on elephant’s arse = modernism. OK. And it was hard and it was crusty. And pretty soon there was not just one barnacle but many. Some say it was one of the worst cases of Modernist Arse Barnacle infestation ever seen. Soon they stopped calling the elephant Henry and started calling him Barnacle Arse or just B.A. for short.

It was embarrasing. People were talking. Something had to be done. A group of Barnacle Arse removal experts were called in. They decided to run a competition. The person who could kick the elephant’s arse and remove one or more barnacles would get a free ride (or rides) at the amusement park. It was on for young and old and so Post-Modernism was off to a roaring start. And here we are.

So where I hear you ask, does Feminism come into this elephant’s arse barnacle kicking business? Good question. I thought you would never ask.

It’s like this you see. Feminism is really, truly, madly, deeply the new paradigm. Sit down you might need a moment. And not just socio-political feminism but cosmic, ecological, killer-app type feminism within the context of humanity. Dr Quantum would venture to suggest that the rise of the feminine is an ACCESS ALL AREAS pass. Consider: Spirituality – the Goddess; Ecology – Mother Earth; Socio-Politics – Calamity Jane. All of these togehter represent the feminine fractal.

A little aside. The fractal has no scale. It is a repeating pattern of self-same similarity discovered by a French Maths professor by the name of Henoit Mandelbrot. His mathematical brilliance can be seen at least in part, in his legacy of the Mandelbrot set.  David Dewey explains the Mandelbrot Set for the mathematically challenged as follows:

The Mandelbrot set, named after Benoit Mandelbrot, is a fractal. Fractals are objects that display self-similarity at various scales. Magnifying a fractal reveals small-scale details similar to the large-scale characteristics. Although the Mandelbrot set is self-similar at magnified scales, the small scale details are not identical to the whole. In fact, the Mandelbrot set is infinitely complex. Yet the process of generating it is based on an extremely simple equation involving complex numbers.

Fractal Image courtesy

Fractals. Thank you Professor Mandelbrot. Your genius flows from the mind of the Goddess-Shakti bejewelled with gifts for humanity. You are a quantum generator par excellence. End of aside.

The Modernist barnacles on the elephants arse of humanity was a blokes club masquerading as culture. The problem with blokes, sorry to say, is essentially that they are kinda dumb. Good at lifting things. Not really that good at running the future. That takes the flowing feminine folds of the ocean anemone within the Mind of God(ess) AKA the Quantum Vacuum Interactive Universe. The feminine fractal has come. Things have changed. You can’t unscramble eggs. The dye is cast. Life will never be the same. The future is different.

Om Shakti. You go girl.

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